The Drinker's Alphabet

1. Alcohol: The key to surviving college
2. Beer: It's what's for dinner
3. Class: What you're supposed to get up and go to after a Thursday night party
4. Dancing: A favorite pastime of almost every drunk, usually looks pathetic
5. Emergency: The keg is empty or there is no one over 21 in your drinking party
6. Fucked Up: Signified by leaning over a toilet puking your guts out
7. Games: Anything that involves cards, quarters and chugging beers
8. Hangover: Reminds you of how great last night was and how much you drank
9. IA: The Klan that really knows how to drink alcohol
10. Jail: Where you'll end up after trying to use a fake ID or stagger home
11. Kissing: What you'll do to anything that moves after 15 beers
12. Lord: Person you beg to get you out of every situation involving alcohol
13. Money: That which you no longer have due to too much partying
14. Not Again!: What you scream when you wake up beside someone you don't know
15. Oh shit!: What you say as you're falling down the stairs.
16. Pee: What you have to do every five minutes while you're drinking beer
17. Quilt: What you puked on last night in bed and have to clean in the morning -- YUCK!
18. Reform: What you promise god you will do while you're puking in the toilet
19. Sex: What you did with that person you met last night while you were drunk
20. Twenty-four: The number of beers it takes ME to get drunk
21. Underage: Most of the drinking population in college town
22. Vodka: The mother of all alcohols and the best way to make Jello
23. Worm: The part of Tequila that reminds you of the porcelin god
24. X-Ray: How they can see into your stomach before they pump it (detox)
25. Yourself: The one who drinks WAY TOO MUCH every weekend
26. Zima: Zomething Different